I remember being 15 years old. I was competitive and focused. I wasn’t naturally gifted, but I enjoyed school, so I didn’t mind working hard to get good grades. I took mostly honor classes with dreams of getting into AP classes which would get me into college where I would continue to get good grades which would allow me to graduate and, eventually, get a job, so I could live the American Dream.

I know what you’re thinking as I hand you that essay with an 86% on it. I know you’re thinking about that quiz you took last week on grammar, the one that you got a 87% on. You’re thinking about that group project you spent all weekend on and basically did yourself because your group members suck. You got a 91% on it, and you didn’t even feel good about it. Now, you really don’t feel good because this essay grade has rendered your A project essentially meaningless. I know you’re recalculating your grade in your head before you even open PowerSchool to check it. You’re hoping to see at least a 90%. You have to have that A.

I know this is what you’re thinking because, at some point in my life, I was you. I was that grade-obsessive high school student. Now, maybe we weren’t exactly the same. Maybe you actually cared about your grade in both math and English whereas I hoped for an A in English and at least a C in math (but I would’ve been happy just to pass). Maybe you study more than I did. Maybe your parents tell you you’re not good enough at home. Maybe I didn’t face exactly the same pressures as you. Regardless, I know what an 89% feels like to you. I know your stomach drops. I know you think about a 89.4% for weeks, wondering what you could’ve done to get just .1% more.

There are some things you should know about that 89% I gave you in my honors English class:

1. I want to give you an A, but I can’t. I can’t give you a grade you didn’t earn even if you were really, really, really close. That’s just not how the world works. Olympic athletes get second place all the time even though they were only a third of a second slower than the guy in first. The faster you learn that, the better off you’ll be.
2. I agonize over all my student’s grades (not just my 89% students but my 59% students, too). Should I bump this student up one percentage point? Should I offer more extra credit? Should I curve this quiz? What should I say to this kid who’s standing in front of me crying because their parents can’t accept that they only have a B?
3. I am proud of you. I know you think it’s lip service when I look at you and tell you I’m proud of you for B work. I don’t give lip service; it’s patronizing and meaningless. I know you worked hard on your essay, project, test, quiz, homework assignment, recitation of 400 lines from Romeo & Juliet, papier-mâché recreation of the Radley house, etc. Be proud of your hard work! My class is challenging because I want to prepare you for the future. A B is above average; an A is exceptional. Be okay with being above average; you don’t have to be exceptional in everything.
4. You’ll get into college. A B is not going to prevent you from going to college. “But, Mrs. Doss, it’s so hard to get into college now! You don’t even know!” I do know. I get it. It’s insanely competitive–almost to a point of absurdity. However, you will get into some college somewhere. You might not know this, but I was rejected from my dream school. I wanted to study English at UNC. I wasn’t even wait-listed; I was flat out denied. Guess what happened? I moved on. I went to a great school (where I continued to get a handful of 89% final grades), graduated with top honors, and got a good job which does allow me to live the American Dream.
5. You’re probably better off with a B anyway. A students work insanely hard, never have time for the fun parts of life, and end up struggling later. They struggle because they are perfectionist. This is a terrible trait to have if you plan to be successful in pretty much any field. You need to be flexible, patient, and willing to take risks. A students stay inside the box because the A is more important than trying something new. Don’t believe me? Check this out.
6. Your parents are being ridiculous. (Sorry, parents, but it’s true. Your kid’s probably not going to go to an Ivy League. They’ll be successful because they’re awesome and work hard and are brilliantly creative, but they might not change the world, and that’s okay. Just be happy that they’re not doing drugs, getting knocked up, or flunking out.) It’s insane to expect a 15 year old to get all As. It’s even more insane to be disappointed in a 89% in an honors class–or any class for that matter. Even when your parents tell you they expect nothing less than an A, just know that you’re building your future, not theirs. If you know you’ve done your absolute best, then you’re building a pretty great future, one in which you will know how to keep grinding even when you’re not necessarily the best. You don’t have to be the best. In my classroom, at least, you have permission to be mediocre–as long as you try your best.

To my 89% students: I see you. I know you. I am proud of you. You will be okay.

Love,

Mrs. Doss (a teacher who’s probably an 89% teacher, and I’m okay with that)